Johannesburg – Accepting yourself is among others on the top of the list of important things in life to work on. You can only truly build yourself when you accept yourself fully for who you are and what you can do.
Self-acceptance can be a struggle for many. Sometimes we are unable or find It difficult to love or forgive ourselves. A quick exercise, involving two questions, can be done to check if you truly do accept yourself for who you are. These two questions, according to Ashraf Ganrekar, are of vital importance to understanding yourself.
“If you were to ask yourself if you like yourself, the reflex instinctive answer is yes. Then if I was to ask you, what do you like about yourself? Quite honestly there’s going to be a bit of a pause. You’re going to have to be thinking and invariably you’re going to start thinking of the things that you don’t like first. It’s an incredible thing the way the mind works. Self-realisation and self-acceptance is to say well I like who I am now, not the perfect me, not the Instagram me, the Facebook me, I like who I am. The person that you are now, how close are you to the person you want to be?”
What is self-acceptance
Self-acceptance is a form of self-love. Happiness and self-acceptance go hand in hand. We only attempt to attain the amount of happiness we believe we deserve. Accepting yourself allows one to begin to accept others as well.
“Self-acceptance will increase acceptance of the other so that we don’t need to see the other as different nor to see the other as alien because we are okay in who we are. The higher the acceptance of the self, the higher the regard for the other.”
Besides becoming more accepting of others, self-acceptance can help you in several ways that are extremely beneficial to you. Facing problems and challenges while being aware of your strengths and weaknesses helps in overcoming obstacles.
Self-acceptance is about becoming self-aware. Today, we tend to focus and model ourselves on people we see on social media. Everyone is their own person and when we can’t achieve that same look or life, we start to regress and become depressed. Once we accept who we are, we can finally be ourselves. You can be more authentic and feel more comfortable in your own skin. That goes a long way to achieving true happiness.
In addition, it helps us understand our strengths better. This is important as we grow up because it can decide what we want to do with our life. Picking a career based on your strengths and what you love is very important. It can be mentally draining to work in an environment or in a job that you absolutely despise. This will only dampen your mood and reduce your happiness.
Self-acceptance is about accepting your flaws and imperfections. By doing this, we allow ourselves to understand that we are not perfect in any shape or form. It reduces pressure and stress on your mind and body because you begin to accept that not everything you do will turn out perfect and it doesn’t have to. It can also help to deal with harsh criticism from people. This is one of the leading factors of low self-esteem.
Accepting yourself – tips to learn how
Now that you want to start this journey, you are probably wondering what the first step is. The first step is self-reflection. Sit somewhere quiet and think about yourself honestly. This only works if you are truly honest with yourself, says Ganrekar. He suggests writing everything that we love about ourselves, our strengths, weaknesses, what we would like to change about ourselves. Admitting we have problems and flaws is a huge first step.
Learn to be kind to yourself. We are often so harsh on ourselves. We are our own worst critics, and it shouldn’t be this way. Talk to yourself in a kind manner if you ever mess up. Everyone makes mistakes but beating yourself up about it won’t help.
Change your thinking. Positive thoughts breed a positive life. Get rid of negative thoughts one by one. Slowly replace them with reaffirming thoughts. Your happiness depends on you and what your inner voice echoes.
Acknowledge all the good aspects about yourself. Look at all the moments in life, past or present, when you felt amazing and understand that is the real you. You are amazing. You are capable of wonderful things. Acknowledge these things about you.
Then relax, take a deep breath, and understand that this is more like a marathon than anything else. You will stumble, you will fall but get right back up and continue because the benefits are way worth the effort.
Once you accept yourself, you will begin to value yourself, accept others as they are and not demand that they try to reach your standards. You will lead a much better life doing the things you know you can do and brushing off any harsh words from others.
Ashraf Garda speaks with Ashraf Ganrekar about self acceptance: