Image Source: Psychology Today
Local – Parents have been urged to approach child-rearing with empathy, patience, and self-reflection rather than anger or control. Social auxiliary worker Naeema Dangor from the Islamic Careline said raising emotionally healthy children starts with understanding oneself and creating a supportive home environment.
With nearly three decades of experience in counselling, Dangor said many parents struggle because they bring stress and frustration into their relationships with their children.
She explained that before learning new parenting skills, adults need to recognise harmful habits and replace them with better ones.
“We say to parents, do not shout, do not use violence, do not threaten kids, do not kill your kids with reminders, do not use accusations with no proof,” she said.
She added that connection should always come before correction. According to her, children thrive when parents take the time to understand their individual personalities and needs rather than treating them all the same.
“Spend quality time with our kids… each one is different and needs a different approach.”
Understanding Yourself Before You Can Guide Others
Dangor described self-awareness as the foundation of effective parenting. She said parents who understand their own emotions and values are better equipped to raise confident and respectful children.
“We have to know who we are. So for any parent to first understand themselves… for the spouses themselves to be on the same page with regards to how they want to bring their kids up.”
She said recognising one’s own upbringing and emotional triggers helps parents model calmness and compassion.
“Parents also need to understand that all children are different… You treat in a fair and just manner if you have more than one kid.”
When Discipline Becomes Connection
Dangor said many parents still confuse discipline with punishment, which often damages trust.
She encouraged parents to focus on communication instead of control, stating, “You can’t do that with kids because they have a different social understanding… It’s important to be able to communicate correctly, and that is where we have a lot of problems.”
She explained that rules should be reinforced with warmth and reassurance rather than fear. “Kids need to feel loved… that when they come home, they’re not being judged.”
The Heart of Parenting Lies in Listening
Dangor said love and communication are the strongest tools parents can use. Children, she explained, learn from what they see. If they grow up around patience and kindness, they will reflect it.
Her message to parents was simple: “Listen to your kids. Hug your kids. Love your kids. And guide your kids because all kids need is to be heard.”
