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Mental Health – “True strength is recognising when you need support and having the courage to reach out,” said clinical psychologist, mental health consultant, and Health Professions Council of South Africa (HPCSA) board member, Dr Malebo Mashaba.
She says vulnerability should be reframed as a strength rather than a weakness when it comes to men’s mental health, adding that South Africa needs to confront the harm caused by traditional ideas of masculinity that discourage men from seeking help.
Mashaba said this narrow socialisation leaves many men without the emotional tools to process distress, contributing to silent suffering and rising rates of depression, substance abuse, and suicide.
She added that men are too often taught to perform a role rather than to navigate their own inner lives, which makes it difficult for them to recognise distress in themselves, let alone ask for help.
“Many men have been taught to be providers or protectors and problem solvers, but very few have been taught how to be human. So as a result, you know, this month what we do is to remind them, and also remind ourselves, that men need also spaces to feel, to heal, and to be supported.”
Childhood Trauma and Initiation Practices
Traditional male initiation practices, often conducted without follow-up psychological support, were highlighted as a significant but under-acknowledged source of childhood trauma among South African men.
Mashaba said the rigid, non-negotiable nature of these rites of passage can leave lasting psychological effects that surface only later in life, often when men seek therapy as adults.
She noted that although these practices are intended to mark a recognised cultural rite of passage, the lack of space for individual differences within them can conflict with who a man later wants to become.
“There is a whole significant indication of trauma, childhood trauma that comes from this experience. And while we thought that it is a process where we teach them a particular rite of passage in different cultures, at the same time, it has that thin line where it also infringes on who they want to be.”
Warning Signs Often Overlooked
Families and partners should watch for behavioural changes such as withdrawal, irritability, or sudden shifts in work performance, with overachievement sometimes masking underlying emotional pain rather than reflecting well-being.
Mashaba said outward signs of success do not necessarily indicate good mental health, and urged communities to create non-judgmental spaces where men can speak openly.
She pointed out that physical markers of achievement are often mistaken for proof that someone is coping well, when in fact they can be a coping mechanism used to avoid confronting deeper emotional pain.
“Not all depression looks like sadness. Some men might try to excel in the kind of work that they do. They may be overly productive, and remember, anything physical we use to judge that a person is doing well.”
Men struggling with their mental health were encouraged to reach out to private practitioners, government clinics, or trusted community networks, with the reminder that support is available regardless of how severe or prolonged the difficulty has been.
